Friday, April 2, 2010

Poem for My Farmville-Obsessed Facebook Friends

When I joined Facebook and started to collect Friends there, I was quite startled by the number of posts that sprang onto my page from such applications as Farmville, Vampire Wars, Fishville, ad infinitum. Really, I was amazed at the amount of time people seem to spend playing these games, tending this real estate, feeding these fish, killing these monsters. Once I discovered that I could automatically hide these application posts, I was much happier.  What I don't know is if I have also hidden anything else these Friends might choose to write or post.  Things I might actually want to read or see. Does anyone know the answer to this quandry?

Anyway, I've been mulling this phenomenon over for several weeks now, continuing to be amazed.  Some of these Friends also blog about their virtual pastimes Down On The Farm, adding to my astonishment. There is evidently a Facebook Group dedicated to the idea that "I Don't Care About Your Farm, or Your Fish, or Your Park, or Your Mafia" and I couldn't agree with it more.  I agree with it so much that today I found myself writing a poem to express this idea a little more kindly (I think), and actually posting it in my Notes.  It's not meant to offend anyone, just to vent a little. So, forgive me if you're a dedicated resident of Farmville, and just know that I'm a crabby old woman who likes to spend at least some of her time in the Real World.

Poem For My Facebook Friends

 Although I love you dearly,
each and every one,
There is something urgent
I feel that I must say:

I do not want your Farmville updates,
Virtual notes on crops and weeds,
chicken surprises,
pretend gifts of colored eggs.

No, I want real chickens,
eggs that I can gather in a basket,
warm, with straw and feces
sticking to their shells.
Please do not be offended,
but the blueberries that I want
will stain my fingers,
make noises falling in the pail,
turn my teeth blue when I
eat them in a cobbler or a pie.

It’s all that I can do to keep
catboxes emptied,
water in the birdbaths,
Suet feeders filled.
Your obsessions are your own,
virtual lambs and ponies,
barns you build in outer space.
So, please then, do not share them
with those of us doing what we can
to turn the living compost,
pull weeds, watch seeds
break through the dirt.
We are waiting for our real
tomatoes to grow round and red
and juicy
here on planet earth.

6 comments:

Lisa :-] said...

I find all those stupid games annoying, too. And, yes, you can hide the game without hiding the friend who plays it. I finally went through BOTH my facebook pages and hid all the stupid stuff, and I'm much happier now...

emmapeelDallas said...

Well said. I loathe all those games, and the endless, stupid updates. I unfriended one of my nieces because of Farmville, before I learned I could simply hide the game, because whenever I went onto Facebook, mostly to see updates from my kids, I'd have to wade through a page and a half or more of her Farmville nonsense. What a waste of time!

Lori said...

I am a Yoville addict on Facebook, I have to admit. At home I cook and clean for my family of four; I home school my 14 year-old daughter; I do most of the care-keeping of five dogs; I do 80% of the yard work; I run errands, pay bills, and do volunteer work; I read for pleasure, and I visit real friends in the real world. And every day I log into Yoville to play. It's my down-time that is just for me, and I get a lot of pleasure from it. I have hidden all other applications that I don't play, and I click on status updates under the "friends" button on my home page so that I don't see all the game updates from other people. Loved the poem, but I do love my Yoville, too. lol

Kathy said...

I'm somewhere in the middle here and I love your poem!

I love the idea of blueberries plunking into my pail ... and wish I were able to grow a bush or two. Instead I travel to my very local farm stands during season and pick them there. Strawberries, tomatoes, cukes and corn ... fresh from the soil to me.

Farmville, is a game that I use (or not) as a distraction or entertainment. Sometimes I'm heavy on time spent playing a virtual game and others I'm sparse. I still read my books, clean my house, chat with friend in person and on the phone.

But. I must admit, even I get tired of game updates all day every day.

sunflowerkat321 said...

I'm mystified by the draw of these virtual games. It would be wonderful if you could opt out of all those updates with one click.

Cy Price said...

When hiding the game updates, you must make sure you hide the "application" and not the user. You'll have 3 options: Hide User (whoever your friend is) Hide Application (name of the app) or Cancel. If you just "hide the application, everything else your friends post will be visible.